9 Surefire Ways to Become Un-Hookable (Part 2)

Written by Christine Kane

Click here to view Part 1. Here are the last four ways to become un-hookable:

6 – Quit Whining and Complaining!

One of the easiest things to change is your behavior and how you show up in your world. Whining and complaining are victim activities. As Maya Angelou put it: “Whining is not only graceless, but it can be dangerous. It can alert a brute that a victim is in the neighborhood.” Well put.

Complaining says, “I am not responsible. I am not powerful.” And, as said on Seinfeld, that’s a pretty big matzo ball hanging out there, George.
Remember this: what you put your attention on grows. Even if you’re complaining that you don’t want this thing, you’re still putting your attention on it and attracting it to you.

If you need to whine, or have to have a moment of all-out complaining, always put a container around it. Tell the listener, “Give me five minutes and no more. Then I want you to help me find other ways to look at this.”

7 – Surround yourself with un-hookable people

Other un-hookable conscious people will encourage you to shift old patterns. Being around that influence will help you model your own behavior. Also, they will be less likely to allow you to fall for the usual hooks.

If you don’t know where to go to find people like this, be patient. As you work on these other steps, you’ll begin to attract healthier people into your world.

8 – Immerse yourself

Read about this stuff. Click on this sentence to view my Reading List. I wrote little comments underneath every book, so you can get a feel for if that book appeals to you. Get some of those books. There are lots of great resources out there. If you don’t yet have some people in your life who are un-hookable or at least working on it, then find authors, speakers and blogs that start your day with a consciousness boost. Write your intents on index cards and read them daily. Listen to audiobooks as you drive. You can get them at your library. I’ve mentioned audible.com too. I love audible.com. (Click on the sidebar link.)

Or just click right here:

9 – Meditate and Pray

Meditation is the focused practice of being present and aware. The more you practice it, the more this practice infiltrates your every moment, and the less likely you are to react and get hooked. This is cumulative. Start slowly. 10 minutes is a great start. Do it once at the beginning of the day, and then again at the end of the day.

Don’t let the icky fundamentalists scare you away from prayer. They don’t own the idea. I’m convinced that prayer is the biggest reason I got over bulimia and became a songwriter against so many odds. There’s no right way to pray. Begin where you are. I use a lot of affirmative prayer. I also call on angels and spirit guides and other divine energies. (Truly, it’s like a committee meeting by the time I’ve finished.) I let them know my intents. I let them know what’s hooking me and where I’d like to be instead. It always helps.

——–

One final thought. The topic of being hookable was inspired by a talk Barbara Waterhouse gave. She talked about being “gettable.” She framed it in a context of getting robbed, getting taken, getting ripped off. She encouraged her audience to watch their own beliefs and take full responsibility for attracting everything into their lives. One of the points she made that always sticks with me was this: Remember — if someone can make you either angry or scared, then you are giving them your power. It’s annoying to realize this at times, but when you really check in about it, it’s always true!

{10 comments ... read them below or add one}

leonie August 15, 2006 at 6:09 pm

thanks for this post. thanks for all your other posts. i love that what i’m reading at the moment is totally relevant and in sync with my intentions for how i live my life every day. i’m so glad i found your blog and i’m totally in tune with what you’re writing. i love the law of attraction.

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christine August 15, 2006 at 9:55 pm

hi leonie, thanks for the note, and you’re welcome for the post! i appreciate your kind words, and yay for you doing this important work in your life…

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Palmtreechick August 16, 2006 at 3:32 pm

I totally thought of you and these post this morning while I was at the gym. I am trying hard to remember what exactly someone said to me and I just let it fly.
Thinking…

Eh, I can’t remember what was said but I remember thinking “Hey, that reminds me of Christine’s ‘Hookable’ post.”

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christine August 16, 2006 at 5:25 pm

PTC… That’s so inspiring to me! Thanks. I’m glad to be a part of things shifting in these kinds of habits! Yay for you!

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Stephanie August 17, 2006 at 12:12 pm

Ok, so you see my name and know you’re going to get a story. This one is really pretty amazing.

I’m currently having a big remodelling project done. My x-husband, for all his good traits, was (still is) a packrat. Packrat doesn’t even begin to describe it. Well, we had attic space above the garage which he filled with stuff. Just stuff – old books, old tools (passed down from Packrat Dad), old Pringles cans, old deodorant… you get the picture.

So, the remodel meant that I was going to drywall over the opening to this attic space. I had been asking for about a month for him to come & get what he wanted. The plan was that I would drywall over the rest and let someone else think they were finding a treasure when they bought our house & found it! But, he had my sons take all the stuff out so he could go through it. When he finally came, he took FIVE things with him. 25 boxes of STUFF and he took five things.

Which left me the chore of going through it, which I have been putting off… and putting off. There was this pile of stuff in the middle of my boys’ room, and it really got to me.

Last night was the night. I was finally going to go through it. Considering how annoyed it was making me, I knew I had a choice. I could go up there and be really angry, or not. I chose not. I tackled that pile with a zest, and just became more thankful that packrat was now hoarding somewhere else!

And now the rest of the story. I was almost at the end, when I discovered THE treasure. Due to circumstances in my childhood, a neighborhood family became the family who nurtured me. I had parents at home, but this was my family. The mother was a wonderful lady, and she was also an author. During this time, she published her first book, and gave me a signed copy. “For Stephanie – I love you like another daughter.” I’ve not been able to find the book for years, and we’ve lost track of each other.

You guessed it. I found THE book! I sat & cried, I was so happy. And today I’m going to google Nancy Cover Smith until I find her again. Thank you, Christine, for your wise words!!!

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christine August 17, 2006 at 12:49 pm

Thanks Stephanie! What a great story! I’m happy you found your treasure. (All hail the Packrats!)

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Susie August 17, 2006 at 2:57 pm

Hey Christine!
Wow, what a great series! I’ve noticed that my “hookableness” (sp?) has a direct correlation to my stress levels. So, I’ve been following your suggestions, and I already feel so much lighter…thanks!!! At the end of the day I love to just focus on breathing…it’s amazing how focusing on an automatic behavior can change your position.

One of my favorites (always has been and always will be), is prayer and I’ve been sending lots of prayers to you, your dad and your family…many blessings to you all.

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christine August 17, 2006 at 5:04 pm

Hi Susie, Thanks for the prayers. I’m glad this series has helped! One more post tomorrow!

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Hannah Bridges August 10, 2010 at 7:04 pm

Christine-
I am a junior in high school, and I am a huge fan! (This is my first fan letter/post!)
I’ve loved your songs for as long as I can remember (some of my favorites are All the Relatives, Wide Awake, How Not to Behave, and Falling In Love With The Wind), but I just now came across your blog. High school is the place where all of the hooks decide to get together and annoy me. They are everywhere! And, though I just started reading your blog, I’m confident that your advice will help me to transform this upcoming year into a healthy, balanced, and fruitful building block in my life.

Thanks for Everything,
Hannah

[Reply]

Christine Kane August 11, 2010 at 10:20 am

Hey Hannah! Great to meet you. High school is an intense time, for sure. Please know that and be very kind to you! Feel free to print out all my blogs and read them every night! I wish I had known some of this stuff back in my high school days!

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