One day, many years ago, I was driving from St. Louis to Kansas City.
I had a performance that night. I was tired. My rental car didn’t have cruise control. And I was grumpy.
Plus, my car needed gas.
I checked out the gas prices at the coming exit.
$1.77 per gallon.
“$1.77 a gallon? Are you freakin’ kidding me? It was only $1.63 a few exits ago!”
So, I drove a few more exits, waiting for a better price.
Instead, the next exit was $1.87.
So, I did the logical thing.
I got off at that exit, and I drove back to the other exit to get my gas. I saved exactly $1.20.
Now, I’m not sure exactly WHEN I woke up to the fact that my sense of economy was totally skewed at that moment. But I did. After all, as a performer, my first priority needs to be my well-being. When I drove around trying to save $1.20 for gas, I was ultimately saying three things to the Universe and to my subconscious:
1. My indignant posturing about the price of gas is more important than my well-being.
2. One dollar and twenty cents is more important than arriving 20-minutes earlier at my hotel room for some quiet time.
3. My time and value as an artist and performer are not worth much.
Most of us think that we’ll wait until we “arrive” before we’ll start to take care of ourselves or focus on our true value or set clear boundaries.
The truth is that it’s the other way around.
We have to decide to honor our value FIRST. And we do that by honoring our time, our space, and our priorities. Most of us, however, blow off our valuable time by “majoring in minor things.” Worrying about the little itty-bitty things.
I have a word for this.
I call it “Lack-tions.”
Lack-tions are Actions based in Lack Mentality. They are habits designed to distract us from what’s truly important.
If you want to increase your success and productivity levels, then start observing how much of your time gets burnt up performing Lack-tions. ESPECIALLY if you find yourself constantly complaining that you don’t have time to do the things you really want to do.
Then, stop wasting time on these things!
Very soon after my Missouri trip, I started a new habit of filling my gas tank when it was half-empty. (As opposed to waiting til the low-gas light came on.) I also started playing a game of not even looking at the gas prices and simply choosing whichever gas station looked the happiest.
I didn’t go broke. In fact, I started to do better and make more money.
What you define as a lack-tion will change over time. As you uplevel your life, or your art, or your business, you’ll have less tolerance for these habits of lack that appear out of nowhere and try to distract you with their anxieties. It can be downright fun to let go of them. Now, I challenge myself to stop a lack-tion even before the idea for one can occur!
So, where do you burn up energy with lack-tions? And most importantly, how can you change this behavior and start taking ACTIONS?
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{ 28 comments… read them below or add one }
I love the idea of “lack-tions.” I read a lot of blogs and, though most of them have great advice and it never hurts to hear some of the same key messages about life, I always love it when I stumbled upon something like this, something truly unique and inspiring (though, in this case, you’re inspiring me NOT to do what you’re writing about). I cannot even tell you how many times I’ve taken lack-tion that really wasted time and energy. I bet you I could think of lack-tions I do daily that are such time sucks. This post really made me think about action, and wasted actions, in a new way. Thank you for sharing these great insights!
Again, your last post and this one are amazingly spot-on for me.
Where I live, we have daily powercuts of 3 hours. I used to let my whole life be determined by those 3 hours: when to shop, when to go out, when to use my computer… and it drove me insane. Now, I just do whatever I want to do. So what if that means I have to haul a heavy shopping bag up to the 8th floor? At least *I* determine what to do and when. The only influence the power-cut has on my life now, is *how* I do things (sometimes). It’s not exactly your example of this post, but your blog did inspire me to change so I thought I’d share it
Most inspiring! I have the luxury of being in Tuscany these next two weeks and I am striving NOT to waste a minute of it on lack-tion. Simply sitting and enjoying this view, listening to the sounds of birds and other wildlife, smelling in this Wisteria-rich fresh spring air, and tasting tuscan delights are the ways I intend to spend my time. If only I could be this way back home in my regular life … hmmm … perhaps I can!
thanks, Christine.
i had a great day yesterday and now i know why – i was shifting that lack-tion mindset in mid air.
for the past coupla months, i’ve taken some time each monday to call customers who are… how shall we say this?… “payment impaired”.
i’d gotten to dread those calls.
yesterday however, i took my tea and phone outside.
as i called the folk on my list, i was looking at a new family of ducks in my backyard and felt the breeze drying my clean sheets.
it was VERY HARD to be in a bad place surrounded by all that.
the result? ALL of my past due calls turned into rich, honest, supportive conversations of partnership, valid credit card numbers AND some new orders.
am actually already looking forward to next monday!
Excellent Post…exactly what I needed this morning. Thank you. I just love your blog…and you…very, very inspiring!
Have a wonderful day,
Doreen
Thanks for the additional insights here! Love it! (Lisa — “payment impaired?” that’s great! AND – if I were coaching you, we’d be creating Ideal Client Profiles and setting up advance payment systems, etc etc. That’s your next assignment!)
lol, Christine~
believe you me – i’m already on it!
tis a slow ship to turn that net 30 = cc prepayment for them – AND the turn is happening.
gotta love lack.less shifts, eh?
thanks Coach!
Another great post. It’s funny; I started keeping my tank always half-full a couple years ago, but I only now connected it to valuing my time and energy. I had always thought of it as the logical, practical thing to do, so I wouldn’t be worried about running out of gas or being extra-late getting somewhere because I had to fill the tank. But there truly is a spiritual aspect of it too: I deserve the self-care not to be stuck running on fumes.
Whoa. I like that: I deserve the self-care not to be stuck running on fumes. In any sense.
Beautiful post, Christine. Thank you!
Christine,
I heard you talk about this on your audio call and I totally got this point some years ago. I grew up lower middle class and we never had much money for anything. My dad was creative enough to be able to get by very well but in my mind it stand out clearly as ‘this is too expensive, we cannot afford this, there must be a cheaper version…’ Obviously such an education sticks to you and for years I have made my dad very proud
But then I started resisting and am living a much happier life now. He is still stingy on everything. I am not splurging either. But I have found a good middle way without going broke and having to sell the house
So this one I have already ticked on the to do list of self improvement.
But a reminder is always good.
Thanks
Mimi
I loved reading this. I’m a grad student, and my university funding runs out at the end of August. I started reading your blog awhile ago, and decided that I was stop behaving like lack defined my life. While I wasn’t spending scads of money, I stop worrying about the price of healthy food, of visits to see my family and sweetie, and of small things that brought me genuine pleasure, or that I needed. I started tipping more than I did before, and donating to charity. More importantly, I stopped wasting lots of my time and energy by heading to all kinds of different stores just to save a buck or get a better deal, which I used to do all the time. Shortly after I did all this, I received an award to support buying the materials I needed for my dissertation (mmmm…books). And now, just a few weeks ago, I found out I have received a scholarship that will pay my way for the next year. Pretty remarkable.
Hey Christine,
Great info! Just thinking about “lack mentality” today as I head toward another town meeting where the theme always seems to be, “how can we get more money?” Ugh. realize you already have enough! Much thx,
Giulietta
Rebel at large
Hi Christine,
Was lucky enough to stumble upon your blog a couple of months ago and have been lurking since then. Breaking my silence to say that I *LOVE* this concept of ‘lack-tions’. Simple, powerful, profound. I will definitely use this with myself and with my clients– and make sure to give you credit!
Pamela Mitchell
Reinvention Coach(tm)
Oh, man, this post is so relevant for me right now! I’ve been in MAJOR anxiety mode, with the attendant “lack-tions” (even feeling guilty for buying books, which is so rare! I mean, I LOVE supporting writers of all things, even if I don’t wind up reading the books!) But today I found two pennies and I think the Universe is just saying “Petra, you know you ALWAYS have more than enough money!” Thanks Christine!
Fantastic post and fantastic word! I’m sending it to a friend pronto. Thanks a million!
My lack-tions focus more on the lack of time than the lack of $$.. but cause just as much havoc for me… I have started my day too often with a constant chant… need to get to work.. get to work.. get to work.. get to work.. no time for breakfast, a peek at the paper, or a quick walk with the dogs.. turning my intention to wellness.. and breakfast… I have taken an extra 30 minutes at home each morning… what a difference it makes in my day..
Love your insight and your creativity. this, for some reason, makes me think of how i laugh when i see people driving around in circles in a parking lot, or waiting for a car to leave, so they can have a spot up front. I came in after them and have parked and entered the store already by the time they park! Maybe i should print out this post and put on 4 x 6 cards or something and carry them with me to hand out to those people!
Everytime I read the title of this article I read it as “Lack-tations”! Which makes me laugh, but is something quite different…
My husband and I have a huge lack mentality and spend so much time talking about things we can’t afford, and cursing every bill. I have started trying to turn the conversation around to something more positive, or simply not joining in. It really does make a difference to the way I feel.
Thanks so much for this!!
I really enjoyed reading this, Christine. One goal I’m working on is not wasting time trying to fix silly things that could be handled in a much quicker way and with better results — and this was a reminder that while I’m working on it, I’m not there yet. It’s comforting to know that others out there have fallen into this trap. For me, it’s not always about money, but often relationships. I spend way too much time trying to keep everyone happy, and in the process never saying “no” when I need to. When, in all likelihood, saying “no” would be quick, the people would get over it soon enough, and I’d have some time and the confidence to know it’s okay to do things for me.
My lactions involve finding nice clothes for work that fit me perfectly in the store where they always fit me perfectly…but thinking that surely I can find something for less money. So I spend another 2 hours shopping and finding (again) that things are too long, don’t fit well, aren’t made well etc.
So I return frustrated to store #1 and buy what I know works best and lasts for years. I think I may FINALLY be over this laction, but it has taken years!
Hi Christine! I just read your e-newsletter and thought you might come hear and if you come here to read comments I want you to know that I’m sending you and Atticus lots of positive energy!
I’m so glad you are offering him homeopathy – I have seen it work wonders. I also was with my dear dog, Zoe, when she died, after I told her that she didn’t have to hold onto the body that was causing her pain. That was last November and her amazing spirit is with me still – every day – especially when I take walks outside. All the best to you!
Great post! I am moving in a month, and this is the first time that we are going to pay to have our house cleaned rather than me try to do it myself. I have figured out that my time and sanity during these particularly crazy moments are more important.
Christine, my soon-to-be ex at least left me one useful life lesson… always to believe that my time is my money, and now I live a life completely based in valuing my time over money, and not the other way around. I just wrote a post the other day about lack too, titled Are You A Lack Luster? The lessons we teach kids about seeing the lack in the world are where it all starts to go wrong.
Thanks for a great post!
-Lilly
Christine:
This is a great reminder for all of us during these challenging times. However, last night, I went to a “free” seminar of a very famous, very successful self improvement speaker/author who told us that if we didn’t spend $900 for his weekend seminar later in the summer then we are living a life filled with a “lack” mentality. He also went on to tell us that, if we did not sign up for his weekend seminar we had “weak dreams.” I felt ashamed to have to walk out without signing up, but I’m sorry I lost my job. If I drop $900 bucks on anything, it will be my rent or, if I’m lucky, a laptop computer. I love his book, but I hate this guy’s very manipulative technique. Oh, regardless of whether I attend his seminar, my dreams are pretty big.
Hi Christine,
stumbled upon your site and couldn’t stop reading, very inspiring and original! Love this one about lack-tations, soo true! I have noticed too that it is so much more peaceful to go shopping without looking at the pricing, and just get what I need and deserve
in order to look after my body and my family properly. This creates a feeling of abundance instead of lack, which again attracts abundance, and somehow we always seem to have the money we need to sustain our lifestyle! I like the part about valuing ourselves, especially the “lack-tation” of spending valuable time just to get something a bit cheaper, what funny creatures we are, huh? Especially now I have a young family, I choose to (and am forced to…) spend my time as wisely as possible. Even got a cleaner so I don’t stress about housecleaning and instead can focus on my family and on our business! Am hooked now, what a luxury. Again, just something that makes life easier so I can focus on the important stuff for me and feel peaceful.
Thanks again for this inspiration, I write an inspirational email every week “A Splash of Inspiration” and I will mention your blog sometime and the idea of lack-tations if that is okay with you!
Will try and connect with you as well via email, as I would like to see if we can team up somehow on the subject of vision boards, I think you have connected in the past with my husband Cornelis about our Vision Board software product, which is now more advanced than ever and endorsed by Jack canfield, Bob Proctor etc! (See http://www.visualizeyourgoals.com), also am impressed with your tripple pack, maybe we can endorse this to our customers and members of our inspirational visualization community VisionLounge.com? Am sure it will be of value to them.
Thanks again, have a magical day!
Kindest, Linda
Christine, and other lovely women posting on here:
Thank you, for the wise words and the sense of support, about these struggles we all share.
I just got divorced from a man who viewed money through “scarcity glasses.” Neither of us made much money, but there were abundant things in our lives. But he was sure that money was scarce and his strong sense of “scarcity” prohibited us from spending even on little things that would give us a sense of fun once in a while in the marriage.
I was under that culture of scarcity for the 10 year marriage. I am now trying to un-do that energy, as I move into my new life. I almost died 8 months ago and was hospitalized in Italy for 3 weeks. I spent the last 8 months healing while going through the divorce at the same time.
I am doing my best to see all this as an opportunity for getting my authentic life. But I am realizing I have a lot of fear about diving into my passions. I haven’t been able to work much at all for the past 8 months due to the illness, and divorce is rough financially.
Yet I am going to take a risk and do something that would appear “illogical.” I wonder what you’d say about it? Is it bizarre, or is it the kind of risk and the kind of “follow your heart” that you would advocate?
Here is what I am going to do:
http://italiandreams.wordpress.com/2009/05/09/ten-for-ten-campaign-for-chandi/
Wow. Never thought about it that way. And from now on, I’ll definitely go looking for the happiest gas station.
Hi Christine. I love reading your blog, and I wished I could manifest abundance they way you seem to. I do gratitude journals, I set powerful intentions, I try to remain present, but I need to pay my bills and keep my electricity from being shut off and pay for medications out of pocket because I do not have insurance. I am trying to be mindful, but it feels pointless and discouraging. Maybe I’m not doing this right. But I just have difficulty with the concept of LOA, because I’m hurting and struggling so much now. I will keep reading your blog.
You are so right on, Christine. Since I’ve been reading your blog and listening to your teleclasses, I’ve noticed how much time and energy I waste on lack-tions. It’s freeing and empowering to be letting them go. Thank you!!