If Copywriters Wrote Song Titles…
July 10th, 2008 by Christine Kane
I love ad copy. And I love writing magnetic, catchy headlines on my blog. But it makes me wonder…
What if copywriters wrote song titles?
This is a snapshot of what the Rolling Stone Greatest Songs of All Time would look like…
#1 – Rock-Solid Proof that your Life Lacks Direction and Purpose
#2 – The One Immutable Law of Persuasive World Changing
#3 – Five Irrefutable Reasons Jude Should Listen to Me
#4 – A Must-Smell Formula for Injecting your World with Youthful Enthusiasm
#5 – Give me Three Minutes and I’ll Give You Indisputable Proof that I was Happier 24 Hours Ago
#6 – The Most Shocking Place to Discover the Solutions to All your Problems!
#7 – The Lazy Man’s Guide to Creating a Simplified To-Do List
#8 – Single? No Problem! Here’s How to Add 87% More Joy to Your Life!
#9 – How to Tell a Woman She’s Unattractive and STILL Get Her to Have Sex with You
#10 – Do You Recognize these 12 Early Warning Signs of an Apocalypse?
#11 – 41 Can’t-Miss Ways to Improve your Stalking Skills
#12 – 5 Surefire Ways to Create a Riff that Will Piss Off Every Music Store Clerk from Here to Eternity
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A Friday Night in One Lifetime
Right Outta Nowhere
Rain & Mud & Wild & Green
Live
A Thousand Girls
This Time Last Year
July 10th, 2008 12:06 am
what a great list. i’m all fussy about all sorts of stuff and thought I’d check your blog to help me put things in perspective. Bingo! Thanks Christine. Now I’m going to bed and setting aside all the crap!
July 10th, 2008 7:42 am
That was hilarious!!!!!
I have completly ignored the *How To* aspect of titles in my blog. I know I shouldn’t, but…I just don’t like it so I do.
I just don’t want my blog to sound like a manual for living.
Now I know why.
funny, funny woman.
July 10th, 2008 8:13 am
Bravo Christine! Thanks for the laugh, and for very cleverly putting this blogging thing in perspective. Now I’m off to work on “5 Things to do on a Saturday Night with your Fists” (guess that one):-)
All the best,
Terry
July 10th, 2008 8:40 am
Thanks Kerri and Wendi!
Wendi – I actually like the blog titles. They’ve taught me to step out of my comfort zone and see how other ways work! I just think that sometimes it gets a little outta hand on the blogosphere.
Hi Starbucker – hmmmm – would that be an Elton John song?
July 10th, 2008 8:41 am
Oh, my gosh. These are crackin’ me up! I am not yet a “conscious blogger”, as in, I’m not thinking about building traffic, etc. I just write to get stuff out of my head, so I don’t put too much thought into titles.
This is really funny. Nice connection.
July 10th, 2008 9:31 am
#5 is priceless.
July 10th, 2008 10:08 am
i’m walking around the house cleaning up, singing “i can see clearly now” and thinking “ways improved weather and vision can boost optimism.” =)
July 10th, 2008 10:16 am
caren – the building traffic with titles is interesting and fun. but not good to get driven by! (especially for a 4!
)
thanks colin
kathyla – oo! i like that!
July 10th, 2008 11:01 am
Very clever! Ha!
How ’bout:
“How to Get More Comments After I Key Your Car”
or
“7 Ways to Monetize Your Blog, Dawg”
(sorry, haven’t had my coffee yet.)
July 10th, 2008 11:27 am
Couldn’t resist one more, thought of this while shaving:
“Why Don’t We Get Drunk and Post”
July 10th, 2008 11:33 am
You never fail to make me smile, or in this case laugh out loud with this post! I shall never look at my iPod quite the same after this, as I’m already imagining blogging titles with each new song.
Thank you for another delight-inspiring read!
July 10th, 2008 12:18 pm
That is really funny!
I especially like #11. Nicely done, Christine! People are talking about this post in our forums.
July 10th, 2008 12:58 pm
“The Lazy Man’s Guide to Creating a Simplified To-Do List”
Ha! You should post that with your “To-Do List on Drugs” blog post.
The synchronicity made me smile because I just posted a “Self-Help Thursday: Talking with Led Zeppelin about Self-Esteem” humor piece in my blog. Sometimes popular music just asks for it
July 10th, 2008 1:38 pm
You never fail to amuse and educate!!! Thanks!
July 10th, 2008 2:50 pm
Soooo funny
July 10th, 2008 4:15 pm
Thanks all! I’m getting on a plane right now – but it’s good to read the good thoughts. (mark – those are cute!)
July 10th, 2008 4:58 pm
Best. Blog post. Ever.
Don Mak
July 10th, 2008 6:17 pm
Brilliant! Seems like all I gotta do is check out Billboard’s Top 100 to get blog post ideas.
July 10th, 2008 11:34 pm
Genius.
Thank you for the laugh.
July 11th, 2008 3:52 am
Mmhhh, you must have thought long and hard and played around with words in order to invent these descriptions of the songs. Well done. It gets the brain going.
Small things can do that. Thanks.
I am so glad you posted on my blog – you made my day
July 11th, 2008 8:43 am
Christine,
as I have just started reading the Artist’s Way following your recommended reading list.
I wrote a post about decluttering the left side of my brain
I have poste a question there for you:
http://mindfulmimi.blogspot.com/2008/07/when-im-not-in-my-right-mind-my-left.html
as to whether you actually write your morning pages every day and how in the hell do you find the time in the beginning to do it??? Would you mind posting your answer when you get a chance? Thanks a bunch.
July 11th, 2008 4:38 pm
on a completely separate note, i thought you’d appreciate this:
http://cygnoir.net/2008/07/09/one-month-of-gratitude/
…
July 12th, 2008 5:41 am
These are great!
I can see these being used in the UK as a quiz round at a local ‘Pub Quiz’ (a cultural thing here.
This is where a local Pub usually had a quiz night once a month (on a mid-week quiet night to draw customers in!)It involves small teams, beer and lots of rounds of questions about music, general knowledge etc,and the winning team usually gets a prize – often more beer!)
…Sometimes I’m really embarrassed about my cultural roots!
July 12th, 2008 5:41 am
…ps sorry about the grammar – writing this very quickly!
July 15th, 2008 9:54 am
My personal favorite is #12. I’ve been learning playing guitar so I know that it’s one of the first thing you want to learn to play
July 16th, 2008 7:38 pm
What a great and funny list!
Made my smile for the day.:-D
Should I be worried that I knew what the songs were?
September 11th, 2008 7:20 pm
This is hilarious stuff!