Note: December is Word-of-the-Year Month at Christine’s Blog. As we roll into another New Year, each day will feature a new guest blogger who chose one word as a way of setting intention for her whole year. Today’s guest is Deanne. More about Deanne below.
Balance – 2 : a means of judging or deciding.
When thinking about what word to choose, I didn’t know that the Merriam-Webster dictionary listed this definition as the 2nd entry. I was thinking of balance in the sense of weight – for the perceived imbalance in my life – hovering somewhere at 99% online time, and 1% outdoor time, or 80% client work and 20% art production, and other such inconsistencies, even if the proportions didn’t line up evenly to the Pareto Principle equation, something was definitely out of balance.
I experienced an incredible amount of shoulder pain and was exhausted and cranky from literally sitting down too much in front of the box. I work as a web designer, yet, a case in point of imbalance, Our own company website has languished, gathering dust bunnies, until I removed it almost all together, not having the time to really be inspired and have it nurture our business.
I knew something had to change. Yet I was waffling. And I knew Waffling wasn’t a good word to choose.
I savoured all those delicious words on Christine’s list , rolling them around my tongue, trying them out like candy. “Confidence”, yes that’s what I want! “Discipline”, nope, I’ve got a handle on that. “Gratitude”, hmm… sounds good. And so on. Finally I didn’t choose the word balance, rather my shoulder pain insisted on it!
So, I consider it most amusing that it turns out Balance is a means of judging or deciding.
Initially, I was all gung ho with the word. I re-integrated yoga moves into my morning routine, started walking a lot more, joined a book club – which got me back in the habit of reading actual books, instead of the endless scanning and distracted state of reading blogs et al, and I started drawing again, on, gasp, paper(!), forcing me off the box a lot more often. And the shoulder pain lessened, and I got busy in great ways (more art production, more outdoor time, enjoyable client work) and then I kinda slacked off and forgot about balance. Until, in October, after traveling and trying to combine a working gig with a family visit and whatnot, another mind blowing spasm of pain reached out and, once again, forced me to listen.
Of course, summarizing how one word influences your life in a whole year, condensed down to this story sounds dramatic. But, actually, overall, it was a little more freeing and relaxing, happening in sporadic, gradual moments. In my case, the word helped me in the most simple of ways. That is, when I was feeling quite stressed out throughout the year, I would, now and then, remember, “oh yeah – balance” and take a few deep breaths.
Now, I’m seeing a massage therapist who tells me I have trigger points, partially caused by old injuries (car accident, etc) but I know that partly it’s about balance. I’ve been favouring one way of being in the world (borderline workaholism) and forgetting about the simplicity of pleasure and my other big goals: Making art, being nice to cats, taking time to chat with friends, connecting with my partner…
I’ve been very lucky this year and some old seeds I planted art wise have come to fruition, so I’ve had a lot of good art karma, as well as a public art commission, which is a great opportunity. I was telling friends that I want to go 80% art production, 20% client work, but as I typed that I only just realized I’m still looking at it from the perspective of some kind of equation that favours one way of being over the other. And that is not exactly balanced.
So next year, I’m going for the word Clarity. But, seeing as waffling is still part of my nature, I might change it to Decisive. 
Cheers,
Deanne
design: http://www.diamedia.net
pseudo-blog: http://cheers.diamedia.net
art: http://www.deanneachong.com
p.s. As for the corporate website – it may never be ready, as I can already feel its transition towards a merging of “corporate image” with “conceptual artistic approach”. Maybe my new word will be Integration?
———
BIO: Deanne Achong is an artist and designer working in Vancouver, Canada. Her practice explores photographic and digital media in installations, net art, with a brief foray into robotics, following a residency at the Western Front, where “Sheryl:Crowbot” was born. Most recently, she has been co-commisioned with artist Faith Moosang to produce a public art work for the City of Richmond, BC. She has exhibited her work in Canada, the US and Europe. She also runs her own design company, Dia Media, where her art and business interests dovetail together in a quest to outwit google.
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Hi Deanne,
I, too, tend to think of balance in terms of weight. To look at this word as a means of deciding – interesting. Especially when combined with the weight definition. Deciding to have things weigh out a little more evenly – a great point Deanne. How often do all of us start to favor one particular area in our life? And neglect others, not on purpose, really at a subconscious level? You’re reminding me of the importance of balance, not just from weighing things more evenly – also in making conscious decisions about all of this. Deanne, thank you for sharing your story – and here’s to a great 2009 for you!
Deanne,
Great post. Glad you listened to your body. Pain is its way of telling you something is out of balance or needs deciding. Congrats on breaking out of the workaholic rut. Perhaps your resistance to designing a web site is that you believe it has to be corporate when it ought to be Deanne.
If you’ve got a moment, please click on my name and take a look at my site. I got rid of the corporate babble several years ago and made it my own. You want it to attract the kind of people who want to work with someone like you, so show them Deanne upfront.
Thx G.
Finder of Genius
Deanne, I enjoyed reading your post about your word and it’s effect on
you. I hope that your shoulder pain stops hindering you. I like your
perspective about your word! Yep, Balance is a good one! Good luck in 2009!
Deanne, great post. It appears that ‘balance’ like many ways of deciding, has as much to do with how much we like what we’re doing at the moment as anything. As you found out, it helps if it is a conscious decision made ahead of time to help even out the highs and lows. Good luck in the new year finding that equilibrium of contentedness.
Deanne, What a wonderful post. I am so glad you listened to your body. Sometimes we get going so fast we forget to slow down long enought to listen to ourselves. I have been inspired by your post to use Balance as my word for 2009. Thank you.
Excellent post, Deanne. As an artist and massage therapist, I struggle with balance, too. (And I know how our bodies speak to us in remarkable ways.)
Happy New Year!
Hey everyone, thanks for the great comments.
Giulietta – yes I have been stymied by the corporate hurdle. I’ll certainly check out your site.
Also a big thanks to Christine for hosting all these fabulous guest posts! They are wonderful.