Change starts with decision.
Creating something new starts with decision.
Decision is “Intention with legs.” When you set an intention to make changes in your life, it won’t take long for the Universe to present you with opportunities and choices that will make you very clear about your direction and your desires. (And your power!)
Some of these choices will be terrifying and totally uncomfortable. Some will be old patterns dug up from your past. Some will require that you take a huge risk. Some will require that you let go and say, “Not so much.”
Let’s take Emma for instance.
Years ago, Emma was a client of mine. She came to an event, scared to stand up in front of the group. She was miserable in her job. She hated where she lived. She had settled for everything in her life from her relationship to her career.
During the two days, her path became obvious. And with the encouragement of the women there, Emma returned home knowing it was time to make some decisions.
Less than three months later, Emma moved to Colorado – where she has always dreamed of living. (But never admitted to anyone until that year.) She attracted her ideal job. She created an entire new paradigm for herself and her life.
Here’s what she said with a big grin on her face: “If you saw my new office compared to my old one, it’s so funny! I look out of these big glass windows at snow-capped mountains. At my last job, I looked out at a construction site. Everything is so different now!”
Her shift has been fast. Lightning fast. It can take your breath away.
Are we allowed to move that quickly? Absolutely!
In fact, successful people will tell you that they’ve learned to make decisions in the blink of an eye.
It’s tempting to think that “Yes!” is a decision that will bring velocity, motion, and change. But you’ll learn that “No!” can also create speed as well.
Emma’s first decision upon returning home was to say “No” to her dead-end job. She stopped waiting for them to make a decision to fire her. Instead she started creating her own decisions. She said “No” to the renewal on her condo lease as well. She said no to some of her relationships.
Her yesses didn’t come until after she said a whole bunch of no’s.
People get stuck not because they don’t know what to do. People get stuck when they stop making decisions. (Perhaps even because they stop making decisions.) They get stuck when they stop saying Yes or No.
Instead they put everything on halt and say “Maybe.”
“Maybe” is where we settle for things instead of choosing them.
“Maybe” provides the illusion that we can stay safe.
“Maybe” makes people around us comfortable because we’re not threatening their status quo.
“Maybe” often tells me that people are still a little afraid of their own power. “Maybe” is our way of saying, “Yea, well, I’m not sure I want to live with the consequences of my choice.”
Not making decisions doesn’t keep you safe. It just creates an atmosphere of settling. “Maybe” works for a little while. And sometimes, it’s necessary. However, “maybe” is often just fear of making a decision.
Most of us know our yesses and no’s almost instantly. We know our passions. We know what we want. Even if we think we don’t know what we want, we most certainly know what we don’t want.
The stuff that comes after that instant knowing is just mental ruminating that keeps us stuck.
Stuck saying Maybe.
So, from now on, find a more empowered choice than Maybe.
Here’s a mantra to live by:
“If it’s not a Hell Yes, it’s a Hell No. No one ever says “Hell Maybe!”
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