Change starts with decision.
Creating something new starts with decision.
Decision is â€śIntention with legs.â€ťÂ When you set an intention to make changes in your life, it wonâ€™t take long for the Universe to present you with opportunities and choices that will make you very clear about your direction and your desires. (And your power!)
Some of these choices will be terrifying and totally uncomfortable.Â Some will be old patterns dug up from your past.Â Â Some will require that you take a huge risk.Â Some will require that you let go and say, â€śNot so much.â€ť
Letâ€™s take Emma for instance.
Years ago, Emma was a client of mine.Â She came to an event, scared to stand up in front of the group. She was miserable in her job. She hated where she lived. She had settled for everything in her life from her relationship to her career.
During the two days, her path became obvious. And with the encouragement of the women there, Emma returned home knowing it was time to make some decisions.
Less than three months later, Emma moved to Colorado â€“ where she has always dreamed of living. (But never admitted to anyone until that year.)Â She attracted her ideal job. She created an entire new paradigm for herself and her life.
Hereâ€™s what she said with a big grin on her face:Â Â â€śIf you saw my new office compared to my old one, itâ€™s so funny!Â I look out of these big glass windows at snow-capped mountains. At my last job, I looked out at a construction site. Everything is so different now!â€ť
Her shift has been fast. Lightning fast. It can take your breath away.
Are we allowed to move that quickly?Â Absolutely!
In fact, successful people will tell you that theyâ€™ve learned to make decisions in the blink of an eye.
Itâ€™s tempting to think that â€śYes!â€ť is a decision that will bring velocity, motion, and change.Â But youâ€™ll learn that â€śNo!â€ť can also create speed as well.
Emmaâ€™s first decision upon returning home was to say â€śNoâ€ť to her dead-end job.Â She stopped waiting for them to make a decision to fire her.Â Instead she started creating her own decisions.Â She said â€śNoâ€ť to the renewal on her condo lease as well.Â She said no to some of her relationships.
Her yesses didnâ€™t come until after she said a whole bunch of noâ€™s.
People get stuck not because they donâ€™t know what to do.Â People get stuck when they stop making decisions. (Perhaps even because they stop making decisions.)Â Â They get stuck when they stop saying Yes or No.
Instead they put everything on halt and say â€śMaybe.â€ť
â€śMaybeâ€ť is where we settle for things instead of choosing them.
â€śMaybeâ€ť provides the illusion that we can stay safe.
â€śMaybeâ€ť makes people around us comfortable because weâ€™re not threatening their status quo.
â€śMaybeâ€ť often tells me that people are still a little afraid of their own power.Â â€śMaybeâ€ť is our way of saying, â€śYea, well, Iâ€™m not sure I want to live with the consequences of my choice.â€ť
Not making decisions doesnâ€™t keep you safe. It just creates an atmosphere of settling.Â â€śMaybeâ€ť works for a little while.Â And sometimes, itâ€™s necessary.Â Â However, â€śmaybeâ€ť is often just fear of making a decision.
Most of us know our yesses and noâ€™s almost instantly.Â We know our passions.Â We know what we want.Â Even if we think we donâ€™t know what we want, we most certainly know what we donâ€™t want.
The stuff that comes after that instant knowing is just mental ruminating that keeps us stuck.
Stuck saying Maybe.
So, from now on, find a more empowered choice than Maybe.
Hereâ€™s a mantra to live by:
â€śIf itâ€™s not a Hell Yes, itâ€™s a Hell No. No one ever says â€śHell Maybe!â€ť
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