Doubt is sneaky.
It creeps in on little cat feet and says things that make us believe we’re being rational.
Sometimes it sneaks in some self-deprecating humor to put things in perspective. Sometimes it simply points out that one ought to be “realistic.”
Recently, I heard doubt casually meander in at the end of someone’s moment of bold intention.
Victoria was sharing her plans for 2010, talking about her Word-of-the-Year, and what it meant to her. She told me about the results she would create and the unknowns she would be contending with.
When she was finished, I said, “Wow. I love that!”
And that’s when it happened. Doubt entered. Victoria said:
“Yea. We’ll see.”
It was like a pretty bright red balloon had been floating all around the conversation. But in that moment, she pulled out a pin, popped it, and we watched it fall limply to the ground.
Everything begins with our language. Everything begins with our thoughts. No matter how many people, students, clients, fans, and friends want to fight me on this point – I will say it over and over again:
Your language is the starting point of any transformation in your life. It is the simplest and most basic place to start!
So, here’s 5 things to remember about “We’ll see.”
1 – “We’ll see” is just crappy parenting.
“We’ll see” is what parents say to their kids when they’re not planning on ever seeing. (Or ever deciding.) In other words, they simply hope the issue goes away. (Kids totally know it, too – and they grow up to use the exact same phrase when they’re not planning on ever seeing either.)
2 – “We’ll see” is victim speak.
It says, “Yea. I’ll just sit back and see if this is gonna unfold or not. I don’t plan on engaging or taking action.”
3 – “We’ll see” is protective armor.
It is the ultimate insurance against “I told you so.” It builds a nice little wall around our moment of courage, so that no one can ever say “I told you so” to us. If they do, then we get to say, “Hey man, I made this wall of doubt here – so you can’t say that. I already beat you to it.”
4 – “We’ll see” keeps the collective in tact.
Notice you don’t say, “I’ll see.”
You say, “We’ll see.”
It’s like you’re saying, “I’m going to succeed. This path gets better and better, and I’m getting happier and happier. Hmmm. So let me join you on the sidelines and let’s analyze how I’m doing.”
No one will ever have to envy us, judge us, criticize us or doubt us – as long as we step back into the crowd to “see” how we’re doing.
5 – “We’ll see” is just energy disguised as fear.
In fact, if we could translate the energy that was trying to be born at the moment “We’ll see” was being uttered – it would probably go something like this:
“Holy Moly, I am moving faster and farther than I ever thought I could. I’m a little scared, yes. But dang, I gotta tell ya, this discomfort, this wild ride, is unbelievably exciting and SO much better than the boringness of security and the illusion of safety! So, what I really want to say here is this:
Join me! And lemme show you how it’s done!”