11 Random Things I Love About My Mom - Christine Kane

mombday2.jpgToday is my mom’s birthday

I’ve had many long talks with girlfriends about moms. These talks often happen late at night when we’re sipping wine and getting quiet. No matter who I’m talking with, we always agree that the depth of love and connection between daughters and moms is palpable. Sometimes even painful. I have started a practice whenever I visit now. I try to see my mom. To really look at her. To take her in. It’s so easy to blow through our lives without really seeing the people we love. I have been guilty of that.

My mom doesn’t get to read my blog very often. This is partly because in the past year most of her energy has been going into caring for my dad, who had a stroke last August. It’s also partly because she’s not a big fan of computers. So, I’m writing this post just for her because it’s her birthday, and she hasn’t gotten a lot of attention this past year. Today is her day.

So, in the spirit of blog post writing etiquette, here’s 11 Random Things I Love about my mom…

1. I love that whenever I see Lily of the Valley, I think of her. I love that the fragrance reminds me of my mom and the big patch of Lily of the Valley that she planted in the shady side yard of our old house.

2. I love that whenever I go home, no matter what has gone on in her world, there is always a fresh little vase of flowers on the kitchen table.

3. I love that I still get regular handwritten letters and notes from her. I also love that she always sends me (and my siblings, and now, my husband) cards for every birthday, holiday, and holy day, and that there’s always a note about how special we each are.

4. I love that my mom made our meals every single night of our lives when we were kids. (I hated this when I was a kid. All my friends got to eat at McDonalds. And we never got to eat at McDonalds. And if we ever did get anything from McDonalds, she’d fix us a salad on the side! A SALAD!) My mom still cooks every night. I do too. She taught me well.

5. I love my mom’s unbridled enthusiasm for everything. She loves going out to plays, theatre, museum exhibits, gatherings of any kind, and great restaurants. And afterwards, she will recount every single detail and taste and texture for you.

6. I love that my mom sang a song to me every night when I went to bed. That’s how I know songs like, “Shine on Harvest Moon” and “Down by the Old Mill Stream.” And I love love love that she wrote a song just for me called “Have you Ever Seen a Treasure?” I can still sing it word for word.

7. I love the ferocity of my mom’s love. She’s the glue that holds my family together. And she has been a warrior for and with my dad throughout this year.

8 . I love that my mom is probably the most stubborn person I know. Besides me. (I’m a Taurus, too. It wasn’t exactly Our Town in my house when I was a teen.)

9. I love that in every story of my childhood that my mom retells, I was always five. Five was apparently a big year for me.

10. I love that when I take my dog to visit, I wake up every morning to find that my dog is already in the kitchen lying next to my mom with her tail wagging slowly. My mom will whisper, “Well, I just gave her a little bacon.”

11. I love that my mom writes in a gratitude journal. I hope that she will write today about how grateful she is for the beautiful world that she has created and for her own vitality and zest and joy that she has passed on to so many others.

Happy birthday, Mom! I love you!

29 COMMENTS ADD A COMMENT
  • Esther Small

    I stumbled across your website/blog a couple days ago… Ahh there you are… Finally I can start my life again! I have spent 7 years of whining, being stuck in my bitterness after losing the financial success I once enjoyed with my Children Father when he decided to share it with someone else. I know these principals work because I did this before… I am waking up again… Thank you!

    I just spent the weekend with my aging parents. I have been saddened while watching the slow winding down of my sweet mom’s life. She is gracefully entering the age where we learn the art of taking care of her, while allowing her to keep her dignity… I gently asked my European gruff Father, to please start talking Softly to her… I love my mom and honor her life so much!

    When I was a little girl, I had a vase of lily of the valleys.. At night, I would pick the flowers off and press them into my teeth dreaming of having big pearly whites ๐Ÿ˜€

    Thank you for being here, sharing your life and letting me find you! I have so much to read and do! Do you ever come to the S.W. Coast of Canada?

  • onlineanjali

    Stumbled to your blog today and absolutely loved this post , especially point no 4:)

    It was the same at my place while I was growing up and I realize today that I have good eating habits thanks to mom ..I am a working mother of two cute daughters aged four and two and I find myself comparing myself to mom…..mom would do this for us …am I doing the same for my kids …if I am means I am on the right path ..if not it means I better clean up my act ๐Ÿ™‚

  • thodarumm

    Thank you for this wonderful post.
    I have been busy and have not been reading your blog the last few days. Today, I came, hurriedly scanned, chose this entry to read and wow.. what a beautiful entry. I had a few tears.

    OK, I have some cathcing up to do, but I think dinner is getting burnt.. later, later.
    ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Karen

    What a beautiful post! Happy Birthday to your mom!

  • Christine Kane

    hi kloudia, yes, it is quite the cute scene! thanks for your birthday wishes to mom!

    kelli, what a great note to all the commenters. thanks for that!

    thanks janice. i’ll have to check out that bob proctor interview.

    hi alex, I’m sending you lots of light as you go through this huge transition in your life. i know your children will have so many insights and stories about you, and unending love for you. (which isn’t to say they won’t go through times of NOT feeling this way! just ask my mom!)

  • Alex Radich

    You know it is a hard time today as I am in the process of divorce. And I have always felt that my parents did not give enough attention to me. I love them, though. I would give all my efforts and strength to be the person whose children could write such nice words about me. The life is meant for that. Thank you for a heart-felt article.

  • Janice

    Hi Christine

    A beautiful post on Mom’s greatness (not discounting Dad’s greatness too ;)). Belated though it is, please add my well-wishes to your Mom… Happy Birthday ๐Ÿ™‚

    I agree with you that the depth of love and connection between daughters and moms is palpable. Sometimes even painful.

    I especially like point 11 about your mom writing a gratitude journal. Shows your mom to be a wise woman and knowing about how to get Law of Attraction to work for her.

    As mentioned in a recent interview given by Bob Proctor which I recently came across, “Gratitude is an attitude that is our thoughts, our feelings and actions, and it hook us up to our source of supply…”

  • Kelli King

    This post is just in time for Mother’s Day!! What a treat. I will be forwarding a link for my mother and my girlfriends. Thank you all for sharing your experiences–it’s amazing to read the posts and comments–blessings to all of you for participating! It’s the totality of the circle that makes this blog so exciting. I loved the bacon bit, too! Annette, here’s to a wonderful new trip around the sun! Djuro, ฤurฤ‘ica , my deepest sympathies to you and your family. I’ll always think of that beautiful croatian word when look at a lily of the valley. Cheers, all. Have an outstanding Saturday…

  • Kloudiia

    I can visualise your dog lying beside your mom, with eyes half-closed. I seem to be able to smell the aroma of food, cooked and prepared with nothing but love. Thank you Christine, and your mom Annette for such a lovely reminder to us.

    A birthday kiss for your mom! ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Christine Kane

    Thanks everyone! I’ve gotten lots of emails (in addition to comments here) thanking me for the tears. I always think of the blog world as being so left brain and business-y – so I’m touched to know that some hearts were opened here…

  • Michelle

    It makes me think happy thoughts about my own mom. She’s moving away and I’m going to miss her.

  • Patricia

    Happy belated birthday to your mom – I have a list of things I would have shared with my mom but lost her 5 years ago after serious illness. I feel we connected on many levels but had difficulty with the love pieces even though she knew I loved her deeply as I know she loved me – it was just hard to express it to each other. And I love lilies of the valley and they remind me of my mom’s garden every spring.

  • violette

    Christine……what a lovely tribute to your mom! Happy Birthday Christine’s Mom!

    I love Lily of the Valley too……they remind me of my childhood.

    your post made me think of how much i appreciate my Mom even though at times she drives me a wee bit crazy!

    Love,
    Violette

  • Susie

    Happy Birthday Christine’s Mom!!!
    Lily of the Valley…that must be a pretty popular flower for moms, or at least super-cool, wonderful moms; my mom loves this flower too!

  • Joy

    i can’t stop crying. sobbing is more like it. partly because of the beauty of you words and partly because i’m now missing my mother. wishing i could tell her one more time how much i love and appreciate her.

    i got to meet your mom at your wedding reception. i feel like i know her through our conversations. what a beautiful, smart and gracious woman she is. how wonderful for for her to be “seen” by you so deeply and clearly and to be acknowledged so beautifully.

  • Kathy

    Ok this one made me cry. Not only because I know your mom and how much this will mean to her but I am of course always missing my own mom even five years after her death. I’d have loved to print this out and send it to her in a Mother’s Day card…she was always clipping things she thought we’d be interested in…or things she WANTED us to be interested in…and sending them right up until she got so sick in the end. We are blessed to have our moms. This is a touching living tribute to yours and I thank you for it. Every tear is a gift from god and you’ve given me several gifts just now. ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Meg

    You are blessed to have one another! What touching words from each of you. Thank you for sharing with us!

  • Kay

    WOW, What a treat to come home from a full day of teaching and be able to read and share such a beautiful,loving passage.
    Thank you Christine!!
    And Happy Birthday and thanks to your Mom, too!!

  • Annette

    If your respondents were moved to tears, think about me! What a wonderful birthday greeting, Christine, and your remembrances and thoughts about me are so touching. (I’m glad you noticed the fresh flowers on the table over the years. I didn’t think anybody did!!) And guess what, the lily of the valley bloomed today. I was ectastic. You and they have made my day so special. Love, Mom

  • Christine Kane

    djuro, my turn to cry. I’m so sorry for your loss. I will think of you and say a little prayer when i walk by the patch of lily of the valley down the street from me tonight…

    Thanks Rodney for your own memories too. I’m glad this is re-connecting people with their own mom’s — even in spirit!

  • Rodney

    Like many of your other readers, I found so much of this post resonated strongly with me. The strongest was about the glue holding the family together.

    My mother died early, aged about 64, while my father went on to marry again (twice) & finally checked out at age 88 (we made an 18 hours each way road trip to his third wedding at age 85!). It became blatantly obvious after she died that she had been that glue. My contact with my siblings dropped rather dramatically, although I am pleased to say it has recovered in recent years.

    Happy birthday to your Mum.

  • djuro

    Happy Birthday, Christine’s mom!
    You remind so much of my mom. She named me ฤurฤ‘ica, which means Lilly of the Valley, in Croatian.
    My daddy died a little over a week ago. He would always bring me Lilly of the valley on April 23rd, when it’s my name-day.
    He died ten days after my 22nd birthday.
    This year, on the day of the funeral, April 24th, I picked a handful of Lilly of the Valley to throw them in his grave. My mom put them by his head in the casket.
    That’s what moms do. They always find a good use of flowers.

  • Christine Kane

    Thanks everyone for your loving thoughts and words. I was so touched by each note! I’ll make sure my mom reads the comments too! ๐Ÿ™‚

  • JoyGardner

    Lots of resonance here for me, and for many I’m sure. Especially the song, “Shine on Harvest Moon”…my Mom and I can sing that so well! I’ve been truly “seeing” my mom in a deeper way too, especially over the last many years since my Dad died. I look deep into her eyes, now clouded with cataracts, and think…these eyes have seen a lifetime, and it blows me away. I don’t know how many years I have left with my Mom, but her fluffernutter sandwiches, care for me when I was sick, and selfless love for our family will always be a humbling example to me, woven into my very soul. Though I’ve had to forgive a lot over the years, it doesn’t matter when the time remaining is in single digits…amazing how the press of time molds the heart…or unmolds it, as the case may be…Thanks Christine.

  • Megan

    Christine I teared up on this one. Relationships between mothers and daughters are so special. We tend to be mirrors for one another, reflecting our differences and similarities and reveling in all of it. I know my Mom reads this blog too, so I will say thank you for everything you’ve ever taught me, which probably is at the root of everthing I have taught myself as well.

  • lisa

    Beautiful post. Happy Birthday to your mom. I love that she gives your dog bacon. ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Elaine

    What a beautiful post Christine. Thank you for sharing your love for your mom with us out here in cyberspace (blogspace!?). You are so right about taking people for granted…we make life so hectic and it flies by soooo quickly that we can forget those who are most important and closest to us until it’s too late..Thank you for your loving inspiration. Hey!!My brother and I weren’t allowed McDonalds either!!! – not even if we’d have agreed to a salad!! Happy birthday Mom – I hope she has an amazing birthday!!

    Love

    Elaine x

  • Ml

    Happy Birthday to your Mom! She sounds like an absolutely lovely lady.

  • Ramesh Prabhu

    Christine,

    I have subscribed to about 400 odd blogs… I must admit I really get a chance to read only a few of them everyday. However, I have a small list of 15 blogs that I’ve marked my favorites, and yours is at the top of the list, and a post like this is the perfect example of why it is so.

    You are absolutely right… we go through life taking people for granted, especially the ones we love, especially our parents. I have been guilty of that and I believe most people are.

    How wonderful of you to take time to write a special post about things you love about your mom. You are certainly a great inspiration for a lot of people out there.

    Keep doing the good work.

    Peace & Blessings
    Ramesh