Recently, one of my friends lost it.
I’m not allowed to say her name. In fact, I shouldn’t even be writing this. (Let’s face it. These things get pretty ugly.)
There she was. Minding her own business. Learning how to use the iMac I gifted her.
And in the dark of the night, by the soft light of her office lamp, she discovered something that unveiled a disturbing truth of which she was heretofore unawares.
She learned that in spite of all the energy healing, psycho-therapy, acupuncture, reiki, meditation retreats, and Byron Katie’s “Work” she had done – there was still some deep-seated darkness within.
Was it eTrade?
Was it porn?
Was it another Palin Couric interview on YouTube?
It was more heinous than this.
(Insert chilling music score here.)
And it got worse.
My friend soon discovered that this is the year of her 20th high school reunion. Suddenly, she was getting poked and prodded. She was getting beads, snowballs, green beers and group-requests hurled at her from her past – a past she would just as soon forget.
In a spell of deep unconsciousness, she got sucked in. Facebook became more than a social media site. It became a source of self-flagellation. After she tucked her daughter into bed, she’d sneak into her office, log on to Facebook, and turn her self-worth over to the glow of the computer screen. She tried to remind herself of her own successes and happiness and healing. But before she knew it, she was overtaken by a virus that is sweeping our computer culture and randomly taking over the minds of perfectly wonderful human beings.
I call this virus, “The How’m I Doin’?s.”
The “How’m I Doin’?s” will take over your head and convince you that your self-worth is based on how you are being received by the various forms of social media on the internet. Twitter, Match.com, Facebook, FriendFeed, or Blog Stats. Name your poison. The “How’m I Doin’?s” will hunt you down in one of these places. They will find you. You might even be embarrassed at how easy it is to fall prey to this virus. (My friend was horrified!)
I’ve coached people through the Match.com “How’m I Doin’s?” I’ve helped friends through the Facebook “How’m I Doin’?s.” In my first year of blogging, I saw myself go through the Technorati “How’m I Doin’?s.”
And I’ve learned that there is only ONE REMEDY for them. That remedy is simple. (But not always easy.) The remedy is DECISION.
Decide for yourself right now that you are doing great.
Decide that no one is above you or below you.
Decide that numbers are not worth.
And decide that no matter how many followers, friends, subscribers, links, tweetbeeps, notifications, stumbles, feeds, comments, RT’s, or diggs you have – you are simply FABULOUS.
(I officially dedicate this blog post to my friend, who shall remain nameless and fabulous.)