This is Part 4 in this series on the snarkiest (and most common) ways we misinterpret the Law of Attraction.

Quick review: The first misconception is about blame. The second misconception is making it a part time thing. The third misconception is taking it personally.

So, now we arrive at the fourth snarkiest misconception about the Law of Attraction…

#4 – Forgetting freedom

I have mentored performers and artists, both through my retreats and my e-Seminar. They’re intending success in their creative work and in their careers. Sometimes one of them gets a bad review, has a bad showcase, or doesn’t do well at an opening. She calls me in a panic. Her instant fear is that her career is over. Done. Finished. “You’ll never work in this town again!”

I don’t say anything about “attracting” this situation. I tell her the very thing that I’ve learned over and over again in similar situations:

Only you get to decide whether or not your career is over. You still have that choice. No one out there makes that choice for you. This is the ultimate freedom in your life.

When she begins to understand this, she breathes a sigh of relief.

Once she gets over the grief and the emotion of the incident, I encourage her to get back to focus. This means getting clear about who she is, and what she wants in her work. This means putting her attention on the happy feeling of success and the direction in which she is headed.

This does astonishing things to shift her energy. She is then free to look at the situation and ask herself if she created it, or attracted it and most importantly, what it can teach her.

This is one small example of one small incident, of course.

But, no matter what the incident might be, these incidents and daily choices are exactly where you can apply the Law of Attraction. It’s tempting – in so many situations – to believe that the outside world controls our destiny. It’s easy to head straight into the panic without remembering that our thoughts about the situation have enormous impact. There is always a point of choice.

If there’s one gift I’ve received from working with this principle – even with my own snarky misconceptions and resistance – it is this: The Law of Attraction is about taking responsibility for your life – your thoughts, your actions, your speech. Accepting that responsibility is pure freedom.

Pure freedom is knowing your life is in your hands – whether that be your thoughts, your actions, your translation of the situation, what you choose to believe, or what you choose to say to other people.

Pure freedom is knowing no one else can define your joy, your light, your delight, your success, and your abundance. You define those things for yourself. You choose them.

Pure freedom is knowing if you created the things that you don’t like about your life, then you can create something different. There’s only one place you need begin – inside of you.

Pure freedom is knowing that you can keep choosing this over and over again, instead of waiting for something outside of you to rescue you. You can try a different action, a different thought, a new approach.

Taking responsibility for your life is not a burden. Taking responsibility for your life is liberating. Being clear about who you want to be and what you want to do and then moving in that direction is powerful work indeed. It will teach you that the limitations you experience are more about your insides than about the world out there.

You get to choose how to think, plain and simple. It takes constant and compassionate practice, for sure. But when you start to understand the feeling of freedom, you’ll know why so many people believe in the value of this work.

10 COMMENTS ADD A COMMENT
  • a. wilson

    Old (34 years old) pre-med student here. Can this be applied to the catastrophist thinking I see in a lot of pre-med students?

    1. You get a B in Organic Chemistry. OH NO!!!! Or even a C in one of your pre-requisite classes. OH NO!!!!!!! OH MY GOD! Or even fail one of them. OH NO!!! [I just can’t believe this is the end of the world; there is always the opportunity to learn what mistake one made, and re-take a class, even if you have to do it at a different school or petition for a retake]

    2. You fail to create a very high GPA. OH NO!!! I can’t RAISE my GPA!!! [This is a real issue for me, I completed 54 units with undiagnosed ADHD before I finally got dxed and got on medication. My undergrad GPA is not going to be very high.]

    3. You (heaven forbid) fail a class. OH MY GOD! OH NO!!! I can’t RETAKE THE CLASS like everyone else other than pre-med students, has to do when they fail a class!

    4. You don’t get in, in your first try. OH NO!!! I can’t keep trying!!

    5. You think the other students in your class are your direct competition for seats in med school (myth of scarcity, most pre-med students have this).

    I see a lot of these misconceptions among pre-med students. I kind of avoid dealing with other pre-meds just to avoid getting sucked into this kind of thinking…

  • Anders S. Vaerge

    Just read the post – in lack of a nicer language, I say; that’s the most clear and best da.. post I have read from anyone in a long time…maybe even the last 32 years (and I’m 33!). This part I’ve inserted below is just so short and clear and pure, and I think it should be part of the Humanity’s Universal Bill of Rights (it’s not made yet, but here’s the first part!):

    Pure freedom is knowing your life is in your hands – whether that be your thoughts, your actions, your translation of the situation, what you choose to believe, or what you choose to say to other people.
    Pure freedom is knowing no one else can define your joy, your light, your delight, your success, and your abundance. You define those things for yourself. You choose them.
    Pure freedom is knowing if you created the things that you don’t like about your life, then you can create something different. There’s only one place you need begin – inside of you.
    Pure freedom is knowing that you can keep choosing this over and over again, instead of waiting for something outside of you to rescue you. You can try a different action, a different thought, a new approach

    /Anders

  • Paula G

    The thing I find gives many people a snag when it comes to taking responsibility is that they move from feeling like a victim to victimizing themselves. That is, the self-blame game of beating themselves up in an “aren’t I a bozo” game. Rather than just noticing what is happening, taking responsibility for co-creating it on some level, and then powerfully choosing what’s next in terms of how they interpret, react, choose to make a change, take new actions, etc.

    Thanks again for the superb series!

  • Diane

    DANG! The handsome prince on a white horse isn’t going to show up?

    I’ve really enjoyed the series. I do believe so much of it and even practiced it long before LoA had a name! It isn’t so much of what happens and all of life’s detours…it is how I react. I guess I struggle with old thought patterns that want to tip toe back in my brain. When some friends and family aren’t on the same page that is hard too.

    Asking myself “Is it an absolute yes?” has helped me so much. Thank you Christine! I’ve spent too many years thinking about stuff from every conceivable angle! Too often in the middle and thinking hmm…maybe. I like cutting to the chase and the real answers are usually crystal clear. Thanks again!

  • Petra

    One of the beauties of taking responsibility is that we can then TRULY take the credit for the positive things that come into our lives. Taking responsibility is empowering. Yes, it requires work (and I’m still working on not blaming external circumstances for the “bad” things that happen). But, LOA or no LOA, holding yourself accountable and accepting responsibility is truly freeing. Thanks, Christine.

  • fivecats

    thank you for this.

    it sums up why i love reading your blog so much!

  • Christine Kane

    thanks irene!

    barb v – i had originally pondered adding something about that this doesn’t mean you are IN CONTROL of everything. but then the post just started to get way too bogged down! (i tend to look at every angle – which is why this blog became a series and not just one post!) great thoughts – thanks!

    mark – when it comes down to it, all of this work is very much a personal choice and a personal growth thing. that’s why i don’t use it to judge or try to figure out situations over which i have no control.

  • Mark

    I like this post Christine. Sort of reminds me of what self-help guru Tony Robbins says: “The past does not equal the future”. I love the idea that we can choose again at any moment – our attitude, our lifestyle – even if we screwed up 2 minutes ago we can forget about it and start fresh…no matter what anyone else says or thinks. This idea has been a great help and comfort to me.

  • Barb V

    You always have a choice…in everything. That is a great responsibility. Sometimes though, I think people mistake responsibility for control. I watch people who feel they must control everything in their lives, from what time everyone must arrive for dinner to where they will sit at the table. I learned many years back that once I gave up control of most situations, life became so much easier. I then had the time to look at my life and take responsibility because I wasn’t using so much energy trying to control other’s in order to have what I thought would be perfect situations for a life I thought I wanted.

  • Irene

    Christine, it is true that one has to take responsibility for one’s life. The freedom is there for the taking. I think sometimes we let the outside decide our life so the responsibility doesn’t fall upon our shoulder. I found out very quickly that letting others make the decision brings a lot of frustration than freedom. Since then I make a conscious decision of being responsible for who I am. I fall off the wagon and the fun of it is to get up and jump back up. There are different ways to work with LOA and the creativity of never stop to amaze me. It is a great gift. Thank you for sharing.