What Are You Putting Out There? - Christine Kane

Today’s post was written by guest blogger, Sue Ludwig. Sue is a neonatal occupational therapist and a published poet. She is a consultant to neonatal intensive care units around the country and a national speaker. She lives in Ohio with her husband and two children.
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We each have a vibe. An energy. Our own individual mojo.

And it’s easy to pick up everyone else’s vibe.

We can walk away from someone feeling energized, centered, happy, or …

Not so much.

We all know people who, when asked, “How are you today?” respond consistently with a sigh, a heaving of the shoulders, and enough negative mojo to throw us backwards.

So, we get that. We feel that emanating from other people.

But do you know what your vibe is?

I work with premature babies. And one of the many things I’ve learned from them is how sensitive they are to our energy.

Let’s say I’m not having the best day at work. I’m stressed or frustrated.

If I open the portholes to an incubator and put my hands on a premature baby without leaving my stress behind, he tells me immediately he doesn’t like that vibe. He startles, furrows his brow, and moves his arms and legs erratically. This is how these babies speak.

The point is I can’t fool these preemies. I can’t pretend to have this chilled out centered vibe if it’s not true. They know. They’re expert vibe-readers who don’t have the ability to accept our drama.

These babies have taught me over time, that it’s possible to choose how I show up. That in the midst of any situation, I can take a deep breath, let go of my negativity and set an intention to allow my positive energy to go forth into the world. Or into an incubator, which is like a very small world itself.

The coolest thing is that it matters.

It matters to every person (and animal) we come into contact with. (Dogs are great vibe-readers too!) With every conversation, interaction, intervention, we have the opportunity to spread a little more of that good mojo.

And that can only be great for the world.

What are you putting out there?

32 COMMENTS ADD A COMMENT
  • Maggie

    I’ve found the horses are the best mojo readers of all. After feeling for years that I must soothe the negative energy givers, I finally realized that is not my responsibility and if someone lowers my own energy that much, they don’t need to be in my life.

  • CJ

    I’m so grateful to BlogHer for bringing me to this site. I’ve been thinking a lot recently about how I present myself to the world. More specifically, I’ve been thinking about how differently I present myself now than I did ten years ago. Rather than open and excited in social situations, I’ve become closed and fearful of how I’m perceived. It happened so gradually that I didn’t notice it. Thank you for this reminder of how easy it is to bring the old me back.

  • Annette

    Thank you, what a beautiful post and a wonderful reminder of how much control we have over what we bring into this world.

  • Pat D.

    and thanks to SUE!!!

  • Pat D.

    Very topical! I just attended a “spiritual” lecture and it was about not giving your power away. In essence, think about what “vibe” you are feeding at the moment. Are you being judgmental? That’s hard NOT to do, but it feeds a negative vibe. CHOOSE to feed the positive vibe. Those preemies are so connected to the life force that brought them here. They are so new and pure and they certainly do “speak” with body language enough to feel a person’s vibes and energy field. Shake it off like water off a duck’s back when the negative energy creeps in. Sometimes it takes the tiniest moment of presence to realize we need to change. Take some deep breaths…hold the breath….let it out twice as slowly as you took it in and begin again. 😀

    I’m going through a horrible divorce and, believe me, I am tested every day! Going to the lecture last night affirmed that I have been slipping back in the negative (victim mode) and need to “accentuate the positive!”

    Thanks Christine!

  • Sharon

    Hi Sue,
    That was beautiful. How true that those purest and truest souls can feel us on our purest and truest levels. I am saving this to remember every day. What a gift.

  • Alison Lee

    I knew I would find the perfect tidbit this morning on Christine’s blog.
    Many thanks for the reminder.
    xo
    Alison

  • i let it go

    Thank you so much! I read this post yesterday, after having two days in a row where I very literally felt like the lady in the careerbuilder.com superbowl commercial (i.e. s creaming and banging my hands on my car steering wheel). I know that I am highly sensitive and pick up on the bad vibes of others, which I then sometimes perpetuate. The bad vibes are really flowing at work.

    After reading this and before drifting off to sleep, I thought about my intention for the next day (today). I decided that (today) I would send out a ‘good vibe’ and if any upsets occured, I would just think about my word of the year (stretch) and strech my shoulders up and roll them back, imagining myself rolling the problems off my back.

    I had a great day today. I took a half an hour to help a very panicky and frustrated customer, to reassure her things would be alright, and even called her later in the day to check on her progress. She was very appreciative. I also took a little time to explain to another customer how to take advantage of a new product in order to save her money. She wrote back thanking me explaining how she has been hard hit in this economy. I shared that email with my team (to spread the ‘good vibe’), because at a staff meeting we had determined we wanted to share and hear more of what we are doing ‘right’

    I like the idea, the world needs more radiators! (which is true, there are several people at my work that use personal space heaters-the connection is uncanny!)

  • Lillithmother

    Sue, I have just come upstairs from yelling at my kids to {insert parental command here}.

    I am seething as I write this…I can feel the hours upon hours and layers and layers of frustration and resentment boiling within me. I can also feel the precious minutes I spent this morning, in the pre-waking hours, meditating and re-wiring my brain to look towards the day with positivity and optimism that what I want to change within myself and project into the world…totally shatter.

    Anger is what I’m putting out there right now.

    It is hard to make that instant switch to a calmer self in this environment. I get that it IS a choice…and yet, one that is easily shattered with the next ultrication/upset that needs to be settled in my world.

    This is a thing I have been working on for two years. Two long, anger-filled, regret-filled, tear-filled years. I DO make the choice when I can gather myself. I DO NOT want to be known as the angry/unstable mother that yells all the time. And yet…there it is.

    I’m not sure what I radiate with on a regular basis…I wish I knew. How do you know? I hope it’s not the anger I’ve described from a snapshot of my life…I hope it’s what I radiate in the wee hours of the morning instead. That’s the energy I want to exude with…

    Thank you Sue for the moment to stop and think and make a choice to change…

    Peace (yes I feel more peaceful now…)
    Lil

  • Giulietta

    Fantastic post Sue! Premature Babies are excited to be here. They see life as a miracle. Too many of us lose that ability trying to follow the generic blueprint we bought at the discount mart. We get glum cause it’s not our show.

    I returned my discount mart blueprint awhile back and created my own. It is the guide to a life of adventure, be it meeting new people, learning something new, traveling somewhere cool or standing up for myself. Once I made that shift, everything changed for me.

    Life is a miracle.

    Giulietta
    Dare to be different. Dare to be you!

  • Sue

    Ok, I’ve been meaning to read the Jill Bolte Taylor book for months so now I will be SURE to!!

    And Gayle, that is very amazing. I guess we speak on all sorts of levels eh?

    Thanks for each of your stories. So fun to read 🙂

  • Bro Joe

    Sue,

    You are awesome. I wish I had one tenth of your sensitivity to yourself and the world around you. Love ya.

  • Gayle

    Beautiful post. I’m on leave as a volunteer non-denominational chaplain for dementia patients and had a similar experience but just didn’t know how to put it into words (you did it wonderfully). I quickly learned to silently breathe the words,”I love you,” instead of making conversation or small talk (when conversation was difficult). On one occasion, as we sat silently, a woman looked over at me and said, “I love you, too.” Pretty Amazing. 🙂
    Thanks for the great post.

  • Bob

    Good article. There is much to be said for consuming less media output. Less news is better for ones positive energy. Glad you are part of the family.

  • Tim

    Sue:

    Awesome post!! Thank you for this reminder. While it is not necessarily my word of the year (though it probably should be), I went into 2009 with the goal to recapture the very positive MOJO that I had a few years ago. While my circumstances may not be ideal (long story), my attitude should be.

  • Lisa in Oregon

    This reminds me of some feedback I’ve gotten recently in my work. I’m a choir director at a small local church. It’s been a difficult year with particularly challenging church politics on the administrative side. And in the past I’ve lost jobs because of the energy I bought to a situation, the energy of exhaustion, the energy of resentment. So this year I made a decision that, no matter how little I’d slept, and no matter how much I felt I was getting screwed financially by the Admin Council, when I walked into rehearsal or Sunday morning warmup, I’d bring my best self and my love of music and the choir. I’d just leave that other crap at the door. Not putting on a false face–just choosing the positivity and excitement I really do possess, and bracketing out all the other crap.
    Well, the choir has a really good energy, has been really supportive of me, and has been recruiting others. They also give good feedback about their experience in choir and people on the Admin Council have noticed, too.
    This decision has been one of the best I’ve ever made. Yeah, I’d like to have similar feelings of success with administration and my love life and my financial life…but right now I’m using this example as an inspiration. One of my conducting teachers taught us that the group will always mirror your energy. Same being a teacher in a classroom. Just like the babies that Sue describes. Great post, Sue, it reminds me to bring this attitude to other places in my life.

  • Kate Robertson

    Fantastic post, really reminded me of what Jill Bolte Taylor(the brain scientist who had a stroke) talked about in her book and on Oprah. This reminds me to really think about what I will put out there. Thanks for the reminder.

    AKate

  • Christine Kane

    michele – The world needs radiators??? Blog post! Blog post!

  • Angie

    Sue,
    Of course I love the post. It reminds me of what my husband is always telling…it’s all about the positive mental attitude. Although I must admit that I do not always bring positivity into a situation, your thoughts remind me how important it is. I wonder how much better my interactions with my kids would be if I remembered to bring positive energy to the table?? I’m going to try it tonight! Thanks for being such a wise source of enlightenment. I love ya, sista!!
    Angie

  • Sunrise Sister

    A wonderful post and reminder of “what we ourselves bring” to a relationship!

  • Caren

    Like Stacey, I was reminded of Jill Bolte Taylor. Recently read a really good Steve Pavlina article, too, about LoA and the vibe we put out.

    Man, I’ve got a lot of work to do! 😉 Well, not really. In this moment, I can breathe, deeply. I can be grateful. I can become centered. Thanks for the reminder!

  • Sue

    Wow! This is so cool. LOVE hearing all of your own ‘baby’ experiences and thoughts about how your energy flows to those in your lives. Thank you so much!!

    And Lazz, you made me teary. thank you.

  • Michele

    If only more people in the world could be as sensitive as you are Sue we’d all be so much happier and a lot more healthy too. I have a clinic where I treat all sorts of muscular and skeletal problems, I am happy to say that I succeed where many physicians and ‘experts’ fail this is not because i am so great at my job,it’s entirely due to attitude. My clients often comment on the feel of the place and how positive I am. It seems no one else told them of course it’ll be ok. I don’t believe that they should hope to get better I tell them that they are better because they have arrived here. They leave their bad experiences and negativity behind in my little room often with a few tears and laughs. Positive loving intention is a great healer. One of my clients says that people can be divided into ‘drains’ and ‘radiators’. BE A RADIATOR THE WORLD NEEDS RADIATORS

  • sheista

    Great post! Thanks for the reminder.

  • mary lazzari

    Sue, you never cease to amaze me with your wisdom. As your coworker, I suggest you post this where all of us can read it.

    You are truly a gift.

  • Diane

    Thanks for the reminder of what we can learn from babies and children!

    When you ask a room full of children in kindergarten “Who is an artist?” every child will raise their hand. It is sad what many lose along the way.

  • Laura

    Way to go,Sue! Elaine’s right; you do have a cool job. I know my own kids feel my vibe from 100 miles away; I think it’s fascinating that the babies with whom you don’t spend all day with, still pick up on your energy. And Stacey’s right – it is a matter of training yourself to adapt positive energy patterns – I got a lot of insight into this when I saw _What the Bleep_. Anyway, thanks for allowing us to learn from your babies. Hugs!

  • Carolyn

    ahh yes, thank you. and underneath it all, everyone is a newborn baby. when I can imagine that about a person all my judging slips away.

  • Stacey

    I’m a midwife and I’ve seen a fetal heart rate tracing respond – negatively and positively – to the energy in a room and it’s also been documented in research. It taught me a long time ago to be very conscious of what I bring into the room. Jill Bolte Taylor also experienced this – and describes it in her fascinating book My Stroke of Insight and in a TED talk you can download – when she was unable to talk after a stroke but was able to *feel* the energy of her practitioners and actually felt negative energy as if that person were intending her harm. Learning that my “bad day” could be experienced as harm really got my attention and convinced me that it is so worth it to do whatever needs to be done – deep breaths, focusing on that for which I am grateful – to get back to feeling positively. I am absolutely convinced that doing this is a discipline – just like eating well and exercise – that becomes easier with time and bestows great benefits.

  • Mindful Mimi

    Sue, Christine,
    Great post. Why is it that babies and animals are doing a better job at this than we are? When we grow up we get so disconnected from life and nature. As you said, it takes a simple ‘stopping and taking a deep breath’ and the vibes change.
    Starting the day with that in mind is a good habit to create.
    Thanks
    Mimi

  • Elaine Bailey

    Sue – what a great post!

    Thank you!

    I think you have such a cool job! Those little babies are truly blessed with your energy!

    Wow!

    What a great reminder – that our energy affects everyone and everything around us. It really does matter.

    I’m off to train and put some good energy out there!

    …then I’m off to do the same with my kitties when I get home!

    🙂

  • Lynne

    This is such a cool post! What a wonderful way to think about energy! Years ago, I used to do a lot of volunteer work at Children’s Memorial Hospital in Chicago. I worked in the NICU, and LOVED it… just absolutely loved it. And you’re so right — I think the babies sensed that. My job was “baby rocker”. Not kidding. How great is that, right?

    It was my job to walk around the unit, figure out which kid was screaming the loudest, and rock/comfort him/her until they calmed down. I think I loved it so much because I was really good at it. But what I just realized is that the reason I was so good at it was because I went into every baby’s room with the intention of being calm… and sharing that calm with that little person… so the intent was really strong and really solid. And it worked every single time. No fail.

    This is so timely for me, because I have been spending a lot of time reflecting on my own energy and how to shift it into a more positive state… I think you just gave me the answer. What if I walked into every situation I encounter with the intent to make it happy or calm or whatever… rather than just “showing up.” The possible implications are pretty fun to contemplate!